After seeing a Facebook post yesterday (now deleted) that was posted by Mr Jovian Yoh, the only reason I am naming him is because his posting came across as, well, how can I put it, arrogant as hell.

Mr Yoh lists his employment as “Chief Operations Officer at Cannonball Run”, during yesterday’s Facebook rant he managed to insult pretty much everyone that has ever completed the coast to coast run known as the Cannonball, he also somehow managed to belittle the recent passing of Brock Yates amongst many other things during what can only be described as a hissy fit of truly epic proportions.

Mr Yoh here is why your ‘Cannonball Rally’ is an insult to the legacy of Brock Yates.

Your rally was run from Lenox, MA to a finish point some seven days and nights later in Havana, Cuba. Now you can clearly tell already why this event has got the blood boiling of Cannonball fans and enthusiasts around the world, the Cannonball was a non-stop drive from coast to coast which ended in 1979, having checked my calendar, it’s 2016 and not the 1970’s so your rally is not a Cannonball.

Now think about the non-stop part for a second, you and your co-drivers/navigators or fake patient and or doctor (See the actual Cannonball history 1979 for full details, you may learn something) got in your vehicle of choice and you only stopped for refuelling, driver changes and possibly police or mechanical failure if you were unlucky.

not-a-cannonball-run-not-by-a-long-shot
There appears to be many stops, like seven too many at least

You simply drove non-stop as fast as you could, the only rule being that you must finish in whatever car you started in. The entry requirements for the Cannonball were simple, mail in a cheque for $250, you would receive an entry form which you mailed back, and drivers were then selected to ensure only the best drivers in the best cars ran the Cannonball.

The Cannonball Rally is not a Cannonball for these further and rather important reasons, firstly, you stop overnight, this is not a non-stop race in any way or form, which part of ‘non-stop’ did you not understand, as in you don’t stop at all unless you need fuel, are on fire or about to be imprisoned for the rest of your life in the great state of Oklahoma.

image1
Now this is a Cannonball run, no stops

Secondly, you have entrants driving supercars, whilst normally there is nothing wrong with this, the only race worthy of the Cannonball name featured supercars in the 1970’s, in your rally however they are festooned in many sponsors ad’s including companies that peddle pornography, nice and classy right there, way to drag the name through the mud for sure.

Thirdly, your route, Lenox, MA to Havana, Cuba, hold on, Havana is not even located in North America, given for how much money appears to be running through this rally the one thing you could have budgeted for was a goddam map, whilst the Cannonball did change its route throughout its five runs between 1971 and 1979, the principle remained the same, coast to coast, start line on the East Coast, finish line at the West Coast.

As for all the legacy drivel on your website, please take it down as it’s insulting and frankly nauseating to read, under the ‘2016 Re-launch’ section of your website:

“We intend on carrying on a tradition that still resonates with so many enthusiasts

Closely followed by this even more nauseating entry:

“The namesake is back and without question, will prove to be the best”

During yesterday’s Facebook hissy fit you managed to vaguely attempt to insult various people that have actually achieved the coast to coast run across the US in record time, whilst neither Alex Roy and Ed Bolian never actually raced in an official Cannonball (Alex was too young and I don’t think Ed was even born), the Cannonball undoubtedly directly inspired them to attempt and complete successfully their interpretations of what undoubtedly should be referred to as a Cannonball run. Both Roy and Bolian invested countless hours of their time and energy into achieving their respective records, countless hours of practice runs while defeating (Roy) mechanical failure and investing huge sums of their personal hard earned cash into achieving their respective records.

The car public love car rallies like yours, the chance to see actual supercars in the real world, the Gumball Rally and the Bullrun have given us this on a yearly basis for the last decade or more, your rally, however, is just an insult due to the use of a name that is considered the holy grail of American automotive culture. You could have chosen any name for your rally, instead, you got it wrong, horrendously at that and have managed to insult the great legacy of the creator of the Cannonball himself, the late Brock Yates.

Post Cannonball we had the US Express which used the same basic theory but rightly changed its name, after Roy and Bolian completed their respective records we were thankfully given the $2,904 and the Coast to Coast Express (C2C), both of these most recent events embody the spirit of the original race without attempting to cash in on the name in any way of form, in fact so far as I can research there has never been a Cannonball or similar event that was run for a profit, the final reason why your rally is not and never will be considered a proper Cannonball.

cannonball-run-bikini
Brock Yates and Dan Gurney finish the Cannonball – Photo Credit Unknown (please contact me if this is your photo)

Now you might be thinking what does a guy from little old England know about the Cannonball, back in the mid-2000’s I became obsessed with the car culture associated with events such as the Gumball Rally and the Bullrun, the cars, the point to point driving, the entire madness of it all. If you said to a normal non-car person, I’m going to drive as quickly (but safely) as possible from one point to another while achieving the best time, they would look at you like you were insane, then in 2007 Alex Roy announced that he had indeed laid claim to the Trans-Continental run record with a time of 31 hours and 4 minutes, call this a watershed moment, a moment of inspiration, it was the moment for me that I couldn’t get enough of being in cars and driving.

It was the moment that inspired me to write about cars, the moment that has got me to where I am today, it’s the reason why I plan on attempting my own coast to coast series of records here in the UK in the coming years, all of this inspiration and drive is down to one thing, the Cannonball run and the ethos of freedom that it inspires, the freedom of the open road, the ultimate road trip, the joy of getting behind the wheel of a car and just going for a drive because you can.

 

Comments

comments